Land Transport Museum

went to the LTA museum with Jacquelyn.

She taught me that one can be nice but not too nice.

Some do take advantage of nice people.

Don’t offer any personal belongings to the participants. If we accede to one request, we open the floodgates to more requests in the future. remember, equal sugar.

Don’t offer to buy or give medication to the participants. If he or she is sick, the most one can do is to accompany him or her to the pharmacy. Or under instructions of what medication to get, get it.

There will be at least one stereotypical character in every batch of participants.

Teng Leng has also taught me quite a bit. Being a mentor and supervisor is difficult, especially since he has to handle so many teams and projects.

As the superior, he gives his subordinates the space to be mature about the work they do, as long as they turn in a good job.

He taught me about the total immersion in the subject he loves. He seems like a super dedicated man on the job.

He knows how to make small talk, elicit feedback, offer information, engage professionally with partners.

Amelia, who has been around for 5 years, was telling KH to open his mouth in order to stand out, in order to get that bonus. She also encouraged me to communicate, my stress, or displeasures, to offer and volunteer whenever I want.

And I do want to learn as much as I can from this job. About the nature of this job and the details of engagement and communication in an office and work environment, in the pursuit to become a professional in the future.

I hope to learn more from them.

Thick Face Black Heart

Summary Points from Chin-Ning Chu’s Thick Face, Black Heart: The Path to Thriving, Winning, and Succeeding

Chapter 1: The Essence of Thick Face, Black Heart

• Thick Face, Black Heart is the secret law of nature that governs successful behavior in every aspect of one’s life.
• Often we are so concerned with what makes us feel good that we forget what makes us great. Understanding how to surmount pain, doubt, and failure is an important aspect of the game of winning at life.
• Character is not made of sunshine and roses. Like steel, it is forged in fire, between hammer and the anvil.
• A successful life is one that is lived through understanding and pursuing one’s own path, not chasing after the dreams of others.
• Thick Face, Black Heart is and is not about ruthlessness, yet you will learn that by adapting and adopting nondestructive ruthlessness, you will gain the freedom in actions necessary to achieve effectiveness in the execution of your life’s task.
• Be getting in touch with this power within you, you will gain unshakable clarity and focus to help you discover and achieve your intended destiny.
• Thick Face — the shield: to protect your self from the criticism and the negative opinions of others.
• The thick-faced person has the ability to put self-dbout aside, He refuses to accept the limitations that others have tried to impose on him; more importantly, he does not accept any of the limitations that we commonly impose on ourselves. In his eyes, he is perfect.
• Black Heart — the spear: to do battle with others and yourself.
• A Black Heart is ruthless but no necessarily evil.
• The black-hearted person is above shortsignted compassion. He focuses his attention on goals and ignores the cost. A black-hearted person has the courage to fail.
• The Thick Face, Black Heart practitioner must exercise his ability to ignore criticism, ridicule, and vilification from others, and at the same time carry out his duties as he sees fit.
• Thick Face Black Heart at its crudest level has no moral overtones. It is purely addressing how to get what you want. Thick Face at this level, is totally unconscionable; Black Heart is absolutely ruthless.
• The wisdom of spirituality is the root of mundane living. The ability to judge good from evil is essential to the practitioners of Thick Face, Black Heart. There is no one out there you have to conquer. When you have successfully conquered yourself, the world will be at your feet.
• The ultimate courage of a Thick Face, Black Heart warrior is dispassion. This means having the courage to fight in spite of fear; to be able to detach from the emotions associated with defeat so that its presence does not thwart you.
• The union of the spiritual and material worlds: You will be able to create a meeting ground for the sublime spiritual world and the ruthless business world. Ultimately, you will see no division or conflict between the spiritual world and the ruthelss world. Your sublime spiritual insight will become an essential tool to conquer the day-to-day realities.
• When one acts in harmony with the Universal Will, one’s actions are aligned with teh goold of all and the benefit of all. You are neither self-righteous nor too eager to please, nor are you seeking approval. In conquering, you are ruthless. In action and nonaction, you are changelss. You are a true Thick Face, Black Heart practitioner.

Chapter 2: Preparation for Thick Face, Black Heart: Eleven Principles of Unlearning

• Break the Constraints of teh Inner Images and External Standards. From childhoo, most of us have been taught that the highest prize in teh world is the approval of others. Perhaps it is not stated in so many words, but it is implied in everything that we are told is right and good. Thick FAce, Black Heart is the natural state of your being. This state has been lost to you becuase of well-meaning people who drilled into you all the rules about how you ought to behave and feel. It is also lost to you becuase of an inner image you have created of yourslef out of other people’s expectations and beliefs. You must reclaim the natural state of your true self.
• Search your Own Inner Conviction. There is time to submit to being slapped, and there is a time to hit back twice. It is not whether or not you turn teh other cheeck that is important. It is why you do, or do not, that counts the most.
• Discover the Mystery within the Staunchness of the Oak and the Yielding of the Grass. The grass bends easily in teh wind; the great oak stands unmoved. A strong wind can uproot the oak, but no wind, however strong, can uprrot the grass that bends flat before it. The ideal practitioner of Thick Face, Black Heart is one who possesses Thick Face, Black Heart inwardly, yet whose outward appearance cen be dominating or submissive as the situation demands. He does not have a public or private image of himself to live up to or one that dictates how he must behave.
• Understand yourself. In order to free yourself from the domination of arbitrary standards and discover the true standards by which you should behave, you need to find the courage to do what you must without regard to what others may think.
• Self-observation is Essential to Self-growth. You must first undersant the motives of your own actions in order to understand others.
• Self-knowledge is a more reliable guid to behavior than adherence to arbitrarily imposed standards.
• Break the Bondage of Fear of Success and Fear of Failure. Success means change and risk of failure. The failure of those who attempt extraordinary accomplishments is much more public than ordinary failures and is generally accompanied by sighs of satisfaction. Success also requires the courages to risk disapproval. All independent thought, new ideas, or endeavors beyond the common measure are greeted with disapproval, ranging from skepticism and ridicule to violent outrage. To persevre in anything exceptional requires inner strenght and the unshakable conviction that you are right.
• Understand the Nature of Illusion and Reality. In our everyday lives, we constantly attempt to fix our reality. We want it to fit into our concept of “perfection.” Seeing everything as perfect, is not only a comforting thought when you are experiencing life’s major disappointments, it is also a powerful tool to the Thick Face, Black Heart practitioner when applied to insignificant, day-to-day annoyances.
• Master the Distinctions between Virtue and Vanity. The limited human wisdom that guides our concept of virtue often becomes the compelling force for evil. Our false concept of virtue often is nothing but vanity and an attempt to gain praise or to be self-righteous about how "virtuous" we are, so we may feel superior to others. Often, because this false virtue is accompanied by a dose of human ignorance, virtue becomes an effecctive weapon in making humanity a victim.
• Overcome Fear. Fear is to man’s soul as a drop of poison is to a well of spring water.
• Everything under heaven has its purpose: if we understand the purpsoe of fear, we may use the emotion of fear to benefit our life rather than empower fear to hasten our self-destruction.
• Fear is never so fearful once you look it in the eyes.
• In reality, all things and creatures are one with our Maker — just as in the material world, all elements consist of atomic particles, yet they manifest themseves in infintely different forms. Whenever we experience oursels as separate from that power of Oneness, fear enters. When a salesman sees that his own interst is the opposite of his potential customer’s, he is fearful. When a salesman seeks unity with his customer’s interests, then his fear does not exist.
• If you are not concerned about the outcome of a circumstance, you will experience no fear. Whatever the outcome wil be, will be,  whether you fear it or not.
• Don’t give your fear too much importance. An ignored guest often departs unannounced.
• In spite of your fear, do what you have to do.
• Voyage beyond the Avoidance of Pain and teh Pursuit of Pleasure. We operate our whole lives on teh desire for pleasure and teh avoidance of pain. We are like laboratory rats who have found out which door hides the cheese. History has proven that the blind pursuit of pleasure and avoidance of pain cuas teh human race to sabotage itself. The price of greaness lies beyond the pursuit of pleasure and avoidance of pain.
• Acquire the Courage to Believe in Yourself. Many of the thigns that you have been taught were at one time the radical ideas of individuals who had teh courage to believe what their own hearts and minds told them was true, rather than accpet the common beliefs of their day.
• Realize the Thick Face, Black Heart Nature of the Creator. Destruction is an essential part of Creation. Only the Creator has a face thick enought and a heart black enough to allow His grand design to ruthlessles unfold. Thre Creator does not modify HIs plan fo rhte conveneience of n infinitesimal fragment of Creation, noe does he explain HImself. The universe is run accoding to immutable principles that are far greater than our small concerns.

Chapter 3: Dharma: The Wish-Fulfilling Tree

• Dharma is the understanding of proper actions in any given circumstnace. It means "to act in accordance to one’s duty."
• Dharma is a natural law that guides us to recognize at any given moment of the role each one of us is playing in life. Being true to the duty of that particular role at any time and the very act of accepting and performaing that action is the highest of our ability — that is following Dharma. That act will become our protector and liberator.
• Dharma is the foundation of Thick Face, Black Heart. Thick Face, Black Heart practitioners are vigorous in pursuing the rightness of their actions. They ask themselves in each and every situation, "What is my Dharma at this moment?"
• The grace of Dharma works in subtle and mysterious ways throughout our lives.
• Where there is Dharma, there is victory.
• Whatever your occuptation, you will do well if you can properly identify your Dharma for that job. A chiar, to be useful, must understand its Dharma and be willing to let people sit on it. A pensicil is only useful when it carries our the Dharma of a pencil. If the chair refuses to let people sit on it or the pencil refuses to perform its writing function, they are useless.
• For a truly spiritual individual, the path of spirituality is like walking on a razor’s edge; it si a diligent pursuit of one’s perfection. However, for tohers, the pursuit of spirituality is merely a vague notion; it actually is a pretext, an excuse to practice inertia and avoidance of life’s challenges.
• Nature’s law, unlike man’s, is that you must choose before you act. After an action is delivered, absolute conseqences follow.

Chapter 4: Dharma and Destiny

• According to your life, your duties have been prescribed for you; follow them and your desires will be naturally fulfilled.
• Many teachers preach that you must do what you love, then you will be very good at your job. This os only part of the story. Most people have not reached a clear state of realizing exactly what htey lvoe to do and what they are good at. These peopel need to go through a period of discovery.
• By simply being aware that there is a Divine plan for your life that waits to unfold in the course of life itself, you will begin to be consciously in tune with every incident that comes into your professional and personal life. Treat each incident with the eye of a good detective and try to unveile the mystery of your fate.
• It is impossible to attain true spiritual perfection if you have avoided discovering the path by which you can contribute to society as an individual.
• Human beings’ efforts to mold the outcome of given siutations is nothing compared to what Heaven can do. When thigns don’t turn out as expected, it might be a blessing in disguise. Understand the wisom of the Dharma of acceptance and surrender.
• It is possible that self-effort, which incorporates human will, desire, and ability, is part of predestination, and this predestiny cannot unfold of its own accord. Therefore, predestiny adn self-effort become two wheels of the same cart.
• Be true to your life, true to your desires.
• Some people say, "If God himself would just speak to me and elt me know what He really wants me to do, I would be delighted to do that, no matter how meaningless and humble the work." In fact, God has spoken many times, but they weren’t listening.
• Sometimes people feel that whatever the work they are doing, it could not be what God intended for them. They blame the work. The missing peice here isnot what is wrong with the work they are doing, but rather understanding the work they are performing right now in teh context of the bigger picture of their destiny.
• The Dharma of an employee is to support the employer wholeheartedly. If you cannot support the company you work for, quit your job. You don’t have the freedom to sabotage the company’s morale and reputation through your constant expression of dissatisfaction.
• By living under the grace and guidance of Dharma, life itself becomes the eternal wish-fulfilling tree.

Chapter 5: Winning Through Negative Thinking

• You can succedd the way you are.
• Success comes in every shape and profile. Success comes to some of hte most negative people as well as the most positive ones. Success has more equal vision and less prejudice than teh positive thinking theory promoted by some people.
• Don’t attempt to change your opinion about yourself. By ignoring your inner voice of self-judgment, you are able to free yourself from teh trap that says, "change comes before success."
• Your negativity does not have as much power as your imagination thinks it has.
• The standards of judging negativey are artificially manipulated by humans and are not carved in stone. The standards often change according to the times and culture. What was considered positive in a given time or space may be considered negative in another.
• It is not bad to break the rules you made with yourself. Since you initiated the rules, you can also uninitiate them or creat others tomorrow.
• The evil is not in breaking the rules, but in the shame and guilt that make you judge yourself as unworthy.
• By making and keeping a few vital agreemetns, you will actually be known as a man who keeps his agreements and can be trusted.
• Nothing is absolutely bad or good, not even procrastination. When applied properly, procrastination can be a great asset.
• Consistency is not always a virtue unless you are an accountant.
• A high jumper needs to bend his kness and kower his body before he makes that high leap. Like the high jumper, some people need to bend low in order to jump high in the game of life.
• For some, the time of hibernating and resting is an essential process for generating highly creative energies.
• Often we blame our negativities as teh cuase of failure in our work. In fact, the source of our problem is not our negativities, but rather that we ahve chosen uninspiriing tasks that bring forth our negativities.
• The important thing is to love your negativities, not to judge them, and to learn to use them to raise you up.
• The evil of all negativities is not the emotions and thoughts themselves, but in the judgments come in the vicious form of guilt, shame, and self-blamme.
• Gather all of your negativities, without the intention to correct them and without judgment. While living and working with your negativities, know that these qualities are what make you unique. Be positively negative.
• Do not focus your attention on your negativities but on your dreams, and enver let go the flame of hope. Your hope might be unrealistic and irrational, but keep on hoping. Make your hopes and dreams be your tugboat of life, pulling you along.
• Remember the wombat.

Chapter 6: The Magical Power of Endurance

• The spirit of endurance is an imperative quality in the expedition of our personal growth. This sprir was not a stranger to the early settlers and our founding fathers. Through endurance, this nation was born and made great.
• When one is destined for greater accomplishments in life, the preparation for such a journey can be extensive.
• Defeat is the mother of success.
• Endure by enduring — understanding the difficulties, enduring the hardships, predictng the risks, and tolerating the abuse, all ensure fame and success for such a person.
• What makes one truly great is knowing how to suffer the insufferable and how to endure the unendurable. Everyone knows how to thrive in the good times. It is the trying times that separate the one who has substance from the one who merely possesses the image.
• Through trials and tribulations, one endures by enduring. Thus human spirit triumps over itself.
• Thick Face, Black Heart is the foundation that supports you in enduring the humiliation of defeat and criticism, to rise above it and dare to do what is right in fulfilling your destiny.
• The Chinese word for crisis is made by combining two characters: crisis and opportunity. By observing life, the ancient Chinese wise men realized that the true nature of crisis is an opportunity in disguise. This is similar to the Western concept of “When God closes a door, He opens a window.”
• Without the strenght to endures the crisis, one will not see the opportunity within. It si within the process of endurance that opporutnity reveals itself.
• Opportunity always exists within a crisis situation, but when we lose heart in a devastating crisis, we are blinded by our own emotion. When we can calmly endure the unendurable, the opporutnity for a better alternative surfaces and reveals itself.
• Going with the flowis not about giving up self-effort, but rather about accepting the reality. You must learn to recognize when it is time for action and when it is time to sit out. When you immerse yourself in inactivity, you are also gathering and nuturing your inner strength. by doing so without anxiety, and with a detached spririt, you are able to focus yourself and thus create a force of powerful momentum and unshakable clarity.
• Live your life as if it were someone else’s. You will find tremendous freedom and relief. A transformation of your attitude will occur.
• Liabilities depend on how you see them; you can easily turn them into assets if you start to view your liabilites in a different light. However, a person willnot be able to turn liabilities into assets unless he is able to endure the despondent, dark periods.
• Our negative life situations are essential elements for us to fulfill our intended desitny. However, unless we possess the power of endurance to live through the dark of the night, we will not see the glory of daybreak.

Chapter 7: The Mystery of Money

• The Chinese character for moeny is composed of three symbols: one symbol means gold; the other two represents spears. The chracter for poverty is also composed of three symbols: the symbols depict a man standing at the bottom of a pit, bent as if under a great burden. These characters not only represent money and poverty, but also they say something profound and beautiful about them.
• The first spear symbolizes the outward struggle for survival. Anyone who wishes to accomplish his goals or claim a share of the earth’s abundance must first be prepared to battle for money.
• The second spear represents the battle within. Before one can fight and win the battle without, one must win the battle within. Poverty is more a state of mind than an external condition.
• Money and wealth are obtained through interactions with others.
• To have a sense of your worth, you have to do something that is worthy of your own respect first.
• In reality, most of us are where we want to be finaicially. Obtaining prosperity is not about what you are willing to do to gain it; more importantly, it is about what you are willing to give up in exchange for it.
• Money is the element of life that inspires the greatest emotions in individual human beings. It is tightly connected with the emotions of agony and ecstacy. When you have money, you never feel you have enough. If you have lost money, you wish you had appreciated it more when you did have it.
• The path to wealth is not to chase money for it own sake, but to understand the develop your own instrinsic talents and inclinations.
• Each  of us possesses a spark of individual brilliance. Everyone of us is capable of accomplishing something in our own unique way that cannot be accomplished by anyone else. Striving to discover what is our niche in this vast human market is part of our conquest of life.
• In most cases, life does not play hide-and-seek; rather, we are blind. Our unique abilities often display themselves in mnay situations in teh course of our lives. Because we are so focused on making a living, we do not see anything else.
• The world is like a pyramid of people struggling with one another. You don’t have the choice of whether or not to join in teh struggle, but you can choose where to fight. Don’t fight your battle at teh bottom of the pyramid. It is much too crowded down there. It is easier near the top.
• You don’t have to beg in your prayers for material prsperity. The abundance of the world is freely given to those who claim it as their natural birthright.  
• Adapt the divin touch in your work. What makes an artist, dancer, lawyer, or businessman good is his ability to recreate his Maker’s creatiivyt in his work.
• Outer success will follow the actions and attitudes you manifest due to your experience of success as an inner reality.
• Money is not part of who you are. You didn’t bring it with you at birth, nor will you take it with you at death. Enjoy money, but keep an indifferent attitude toward it.

Chapter 8: Deception Without Deceit

• Evil does not exist in decpetion itself, but rather in the user and uses.
• Human beings will invest time and energy with those who can benefit them the most, now or sometime in the future. This is the simple principle of utility in everything we do; we do it for the benefit of supporting our survival. Even if we are doing selfless service for others, we receive the inner rewards. The giver always benefits equally or more than the recepients.
• A good business deal incorporates the following ideal: In my business I include your interest; in your business, you include my interest.
• We should lend a hand to ambitious and capable individuals for the sake of self-preservation.
• The key to making yourslef important is to serve your fellow man. Through service, you will increase your value to others.
• The con man and the businessman both employ the skills of deception and make others perceive the benefits to be gained by associating with them. The difference between the con man and the businessman is not in their outward actions, but in the expression of their soul.

Chapter 9: Sixteen Noble Attributes of Work

• Work: The Fondest Human Expression. When you work, you fulfill a part of earth’s fondest dream assigned to you when that dream is born.
• Provide for Yourself and Others.
• Your Work is Where Your Spritual Unfoldment Takes Palce. Through work, we encounter people and events that mirror our spiritual state.
• Work: The Greatest Teacher. The purpose of labor is to learn; when you know it, the labor is over. The apple blossom exists to create fruit; when that comes, the petals fall.
• Work Does Not Need You, You Need Work.
• Through Work, Destiny Unfolds. Your work is to discover your work and then with all your heart to give yourself to it.
• Life Evolves through Actions. The bottom line is, as long as you possess a body, you cannot escape work.
• Adopt the Farmer’s Virtue. The time for planting and teh time for harvesting do not wait. If you procrastinate and miss the planting season, you wil have no crop for hte whole year. A rich harvest is dependent on the farmer’s timly dedication to his work. He does not have to read motivational books to overcome his inertia.
• The Working Secret of Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart. Flow with teh Divine Grace. Mozart did not study or aim at any originality.
• Using Intuition as a Business Tool. Intuition is a commodity that is extremely undervalued in the Western world. Yet, everyone who has ever succeeded in any extraordinary task has always drawn upon this power. To put it simply, intuition is your gut feeling. A well-developed intuition is a bankable commodity, and teh source of this intuition is the same as that which provided inspiration for Mozart’s composition.
• Work in the Light of Grace. Grace is like sunshine. It indiscriminately showers light on all. In the same manner, Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart learned how to listen to the music from his Divine Maker. Such creativity comes not through man’s effort alone, but is a gift of your won soal — the Divine Grace.
• Discover Your Natural Rhythm. With our Creator’s infinite imagination, the world never ceases to provide us with wonders. Each one of us is unique. What works for one does not necessarily work for others.
• Reach for Your Limitless Limit. A timber fit for pillars should not be misused for soma small task. If you are capable, then stop selling yourself short by limiting your imagination.
• Three Principles of Work: Purpose, Perseverance, and Patience.
• Work: The Highest Worship and Highest Sacrifice. You perform the sacrifice of doing your duty; you do not have to do anything else. Devoted to duty, man attains perfection.
• The Harmony of Divine Will and Human Will. Being attuned to the Divine will is the most important factor in attracting success. To discover through the right meditation how to be in harmnony withe Divine will is man’s highest obligation.

Chapter 10: The Advantage of Playing the Fool

• Victory through submission. If one is able and strong, then one should disguise oneself in order to appear inept and weak.
• It is a fact of life that no matter how strong or tough you are, there will always be someone stronger and tougher than you.
• It is important to cultivate the sensitivity to recognize when you should fight back and when you should submit.
• It is even more important to develop the strenght to endure the period of submission.
• When it comes to achieving your objectives, submission sometimes can be even more effective than fighting back.
• When you win, you lise. When we fight a battle that we shouldn’t, even if we win, we lose.
• We all have to learn to choose wisely in which battle to fight and in which to accept defeat and subsequently endure the humliation of that defeat.

Chapter 11: Thriving Among the Cunning and Ruthless

• If you don’t stand up for what is rightfully yours, nobody else will. Even when you do stand up for your rights, many will attempt to intimidate you.
• Human beings thrive on competition, and teh rule of competition is winner takes all.
• ONly the strong will survive.
• Those who are naturally cunning and ruthless can always identify sweet and trusting individuals. Just as in the animal kingdom, the strong lion can always single out a sick or weak-spirited wildebeest among a heard of thousands.
• Respect a biting dog from a distance.
• Safeguard insiginifcant and significant advantaes.
• It is not whether your words or actions are tough or gentle; it is the spririt behind your actions and wors that announces your inner state.
• Forbeginning Thick FAce, Black Hearts practitioners, it is most imporant to master the power of yielding.
• While outwardly you may seem to be submissive and non-threatening, inwardly never lose sight of your objectives.
• Whhen you can win a battle by maneuvering obliquely, why go for a frontal assault?
• If you don’t have to trust someone, then you can always trust him.
• All business relationships begin when people wish to combine their efforts in achieving mutually beneficial objectives. However, as time and events unfold, the conflict of interest within the original unity may begin to surface.
• Any seemingly harmless information provided to your counterpart can come back to haunt you, and this will place you in a potentially vulnerable position.
• Keep the thief of peace and the serrenity stealer at arm’s length. These people are masters of "death by a thoughsand cutes."
• The secret is not to convince everyone to agree with you; rather, it is to understand how to have the world polarize its concept of you and to elarn to use this force for your benefit.
• Mahatma Gandhi said, "Most think nonviolence is not to fight. On the contrary, nonviolence is the strongest power… My creed of nonviolence is an extremely active force. It has no room for cowardice or even weakness. There is hope for a violent man to someday becoem non-violent, but there is no hope for a coward."
• In our world, if a nation desires peace, it must arm itself. WIthout sufficient self-defence, peace is nothing but an unattainable dream.
• Similarly, lovers cannot love others unless they feel secure enough to love themselves first. If you life is full of the devastating emotions of anger and defeat, it will be very difficult ot have positive emotions towards others.
• Jim Brown, one of the greatest running backs in the history of American football, said, “When people try to hurt me, it just makes me stronger. I take in that negative energy, runit through my system, and throw it back at them.”
• Then comes an honest man: after a decade of foul air, driven purely by greed and selfish gains, the American people just may be ready for a breath of fresh air — liberation through honest, hard work.
• Through their association with you, people have set imaginary, unrealistic expectations as to what they would gain from your relationshp. When the final results fall short, no matter how noble your motives may have been, you will not escape being labeled as a cunning and rutheless person who has heartlessly made them the victim.
• Huyman being perceive their reality according to their own individual perceptions. The reality does not change, but the perception is altered.
• A Thick Face, Black Heart practitioner knows that in order to be tough and learn how to discipline your thoughts and your actions.
• Whether you are resisting or yielding, in pain or pleasure, in relaxation or effort, you must never lose sight of your intended target.

Chapter 12: Acquiring the Killer Instinct

• To succeed in life, you must have the will and tenacity to finish the job.
• The courage to finish the job quickly and cleanly — that is the killer instinct, the root o fBlack Heart. Every great man and every great villain has it.
• The killer instinct can help an individual accomplish great tasks to benefit mankind, and it can properl an individual to bring destruction upon earth.
• A knife has great utility, and without it life would be extremely inconveneint. Yet a knife is also a deadly weapon.
• The killer instinct is another aspect of Thick Face, Black Heart. It has ensured man’s survival against the hostile elements of nature, as well as from one another, since the time of the cavemen.
• If we have any hope of correcting our timid nature, we must not turn our faces away from teh dark side of reality.
• If our enemies are incorporating the killer instinct and victimizing us, we do not have the luxury of avoiding the topic. As the great military strategist Sun Tzu said, " Know yourself, know your opponents, one hundred battles, one hundred victories."
• It is sad but true that one who possesses and is willing to  use a perfect killer instinct is, was and always will be a bankable commodity.
• I must be cruel, only to be kind. You should never stop exercising your compassion. Have love in your heart, but be smart and express your compassion wiht restraint and detabhment.
• The killer instinct is one aspect of Thick Face, Black Heart would be nothing but good intentions wihtout the power and abilitiy to act.
• The killer instinct is the power that propels us to tkae proper actions in spite of ourselves, keeping us on the path to our objectives. The killer instinct is within each one of us as part of our genetic coding.
• The truth of life is hidden everywhere equally. The lesson of acquiring the perfect killer instinct is not only in the drama of bullfights and the high finance of the buisness world; it also exists in its entirety in the flipping of a pancake.
• The state of mind that aids us in performing the mundane task of flipping a pancake is the same state of mind that executes the perfect killer insitnct.
• Flipping a pancake is not about hte pancake; it is about being in touch with that something inside you that provides you with the courage to overcome your inner timidity and considerations. It si about atpping into that state of prefect strengths, perfect control, and perfect detachment in fulfilling your worthy objectives.

Chapter 13: Thick Face, Blach Heart Leadership

• Uproot the Wicked:

He who is fond of creating clusters among the mediocre-minded people so that he may focus the group’s objective to annihilate the proficient individuals.

He who is ensalved by his extravagant spending habits

He who devotes all of his attention to faultfinding, thus stimulating the group’s discontent, all for the benefit of his selfish aims.

He who only focuses on his personal losses and gains, and whose actions are solely based on the principle of winning at all costs.

• How to Recognize the Individual’s True Character

Debate with him to know his viewpoints on life.

Challenge him verbally to watch the changes of his inner state.

Discuss strategies with him in order to observe his wisdom.

Enlighten him as to the difficulties and dangers ahead, thus to know his courage.

Cause him to be drunk, the observe his real nature.

Make him handle money, then know his virtue.

Assign work to him, then discover his competence.

During the time of misfortune, observe whome he befriends.

During the time of his prosperity, observe who he receives his charity.

During the time he is holding high offices, observe whome he employs.

During the of difficulties, does he act unethically?

During the time of poverty, can he be bribed?

Tempting him wiht lustful sex, observe his steadiness.

• Six Different types of Leaders

The compassionate leader: He guides his troops with a virtuous heart and supervises him with strict standards. He knows his troops’ difficulties and appreciates thier devotion.

The virtuous leader: He who does not reject responsibilities. He is never concerned about his personal interst. To him, there is only glory of death, not the shame of living.

The wise leader: In good times, he is self-restrained. In victory, he is not self-satisfied. He is wise, yet yielding in expression. He is strong, yet humble in manner.

The strategic leader: In planning, he is creative and original. In action, he is resourceful and imaginative. He is able to turn disadvantage into advantage and defeat into victory.

The courageous leader: Place him in an ordinary situation and he seems unimpressive. However, the bigger the challenge, the more courageous he becomes.

The great leader: When he meets a proficient individual, he treats him with great respect. He has the capacity to accept criticism and suggestions. He is tolerant, yet firm. He is courageous and brave, and also skilled in strategies.

• The Eight Character Flaws among Leaders

Greed

Jealousy of others’ competency and proficiency

Being esaily influenced by others’ gossip and opinions and taking delight in praise

Focusing only on understanding others, yet knowing nothing about oneself.

Indecision

Being ensalved by the pleasures of the sense

Malevolence and cowardice

Evasiveness and deceitfulness; only paying lip service; lack of sincerity.

Lacking competence, yet possessing a great sense of self-importance

Taking action hastily

Inertia and laziness

Lacking courage

Being competent but lacking the physical well-being and strenght to carry out one’s ideas

Cruelty

Lack of charisma

• The Nine Essential Abilities of a Leader

The ability to recognize the situation of his opponents

The abilyt to recongize the methods of advance and retreat

The ability to know the limitations of his resources

The ability to recognize favorable timing for actions

The abilty to utilize the natural geographic elements and understand the advantages and disadvantages inherent in any given situation

The ability to exhibit originality in strategic planning and provide his enemy with toal surprise

The ability to hold his plans in total secrecy

The ability to create harmony among his troops

The ability to generate common objectives among his troops

• The Two Standards of Good Leadership

A good leader should not be arrogant. Arroogance will lead him to forget his manners. Due to his lack of manners, he will lose the respect of his troops, who then will reject him and cause his army to disband.

A good leader should not be miserly. This will cause him not to reward deserving individuals properly. When the soldiers have not been rewarded accordingly, they willnot devote themselves to the cause wholeheartedly. This will eventually threaten the national security.

• The Five Assets of a Leader

He possess a majestic air and the ability to motivate others

He respects his elders and is benevolent to his brothers

He is faithful and loyal to his friend

He is tolerante toward the masses

He is diligent in the execution of his duties to accomplish his objectives

• The Eight Liabilities of a leader

He is unable to judge right from wrong

He does not employ proficient individuals

He does not strictly execute the laws

He does not perform charitable works for the needy

He is unable to porject future outcomes

He is unable to prvent the leaking of top-secret information

He does not, or is unable to, recommend deserving individuals for appropriate promotion

He is unable to take full responsibility for his defeat

• The Three Must-Haves for a Proficient Leader

Heart and Stomach: He must surround himself with wise and trustworthy counselors. He needs them as he needs his own heart and stomach. Without these peoplek, it would be as if he were walking in the dark of night wihtout proper directions

Ears and Eyes: He must have additional pairs of ears and eyes who are devoted to him. Without these people, he would be in the dark and isolated. Knowing is power.

Claws and Teeth: Essential when you need to scratch and to bite others. He need to have people who are specialized in executing his killer instincts. Sometimes it is necessary to do some biting and scratching in order to accomplish one’s just objectives, and these people are also useful for one’s own self-defense.

• The Fifteen Codes of Leadership

Understand the importance of espionage

Be diligent in obtaining the enemy’s information

Be fearless when facing superior enemy forces

Be not tempted by bribes

Display aboslute fairness

Show endurance

Exhibit big-heartedness

Be trustworthy

Respect commpetent individuals

Do no allow personal judgment of people to be affected by others’ criticism and gossip

Be truthful and sincere

Show benevolence to the troops

Be loyal and faithful

Understand personal limitations

“Know thyself and they enemy”

• The Four Fundamental Rules of Leadership

Be very clear that your troops know your expectations of them. Make sure they understand what is expected of them when you ask them to mark, and what is expected of them when you ask them to retreat, and what constitutes disobeying an order

Guid them with benevolence and virtue, and they will adopt the concept of proper conduct.

Promote competency and inspire the capable, thus motivating the troops to their peak performance

Be faithful to your standards of punishments and decorations. Let your troops know that you mean what you say. Establish the trust that your word is golden.

• Omens of Vicotry

The proficient are exalted, and the incompetent are removed

The troops enthusiastically carry out the commands

The troops are motivated and high in spirit

Punishments and decorations are carried out in strict manner

• Omens of Defeat

The troops’ spirits are low, and they are listless in carrying out their daily duties

The troops feel insecure about thier position. The slightest rumour causes great uneasiness

The leader overestimates or underestimates the enemy’s strength

The troops are overly converned with their physical comfort

The leader betrays his duty by obtaining secret profits

• The Five Formulas to Motivate Your Troops

Attract extraordinary talents by assuring them prestigous titles and generous salaries

Treat your people with respect and trust their ability to perform.

Set clear standards of expectations for their performance, and praise or reprimand them accordingly

Inspire your people by setting performance standards

Notice all the “little right things” they have done, then priase them. Acknowledge their outstanding performance with bonuses or promotions.

Chapter 14: Thick Within, Black Within

• Thick is within, Black is within. We cannot obtain what we already have.
• Through our "proper" social upbringing, we have disfigured the intuitive understanding of the natural law of winning, which is witin each one of us. We have distorted the natural gift of Thick Face, Black Heart, which was intended to support our spiritual and material growth. Now our task is to rediscover what we already possess.
• Seven Stages of Self-Unfoldment

The Desire to Do Right. The intense desire to be good, to do the right thing. At this stage, you have no tolerance for Thick Face, Black Heart.

Confusion and Negativity. The realization that you have been victimizing yourslef through self-denial and the pretense of self-sacrifice arouses anger and resentment within you. You are confused by the despicable emotions you are experiencing.

The Battle for Surrender. By now you are trying to persuade yourself to accept your despicable emotions.

Acceptance of your Imperfect Perfection. You begin to see yourself as imperfectly perfect. You begin to break new ground and set new standards for yourself.

The New Possibilities. At this stage, you have begun to develop the natural power of Thick Face, Black Heart. This power gives you teh strenght to stand up to your automatic habitual actions and thoughts and venture into new frontiers.

The Inner Harmony. By breaking through your notion of others’ standards and expectations, you find a new surge of inner harmmony: the unfamilear emotion of peace and tranquility.

Detachment: The Power Source of Magnetism. The highest code of living is detachment. At this stage, nothin you possess, possesses you. You become the master of yor possessions., rather than being possessed by them. Detachment is the secret key to obtaining everything you "want." Have you ever noticed when you stop wanting something, the object of your desire comes to you naturally?

At this stage you areto teh world as teh lotus blossom is to the mud pond. Though it has grown from the mud pond, it is untouched by the mud.

• Man’s Three Qualities

Tamas: inertia, obstruction, ignorance, ego domination. When one is in this state, one feels physically sluggish, lethargic, and inactive; mentally foggy; dull, heavy, with a tendency to procrastinate; spiritually unenthusiastic, unresponsive, bored. In this state, teh guiding force for action is dominated by ignorance.

Rajas: activity, struggle, influenced by ego. In this state, one is actively performing his tasks. His mind is agitated, excited, struggling, and sometimes in pain. His spirit is often restless. His activities may bring momentary plesaure, yet the nature of his pleasure is fickle.

Sattva: expansion, pleasure, knowledge, and wisdom. Once acts by being in tune with the guidance of that inner wisdom. In public, he is energetic and pursposeful. IN private, he is humbly cautious. He questions whether his actions are in line with the law of Dharma. Thus, the results of his actions are always beneficial for the greater good, as well as for the good of his destiny.

• Learning the Virtues of the Four Forces. Nature follows the perfect law. Nature is the embodiment of Thick Face, Black Heart. Through contemplation of the natural forces, one obtains the state of Thick Face, Black Heart.

Sister Water: gentle, submissive, humble and ruthless

Brother Fire: usefl, strong, fierce, destructive, purifying

Brother Wind: formless, strong, fierce

Mother Earth: giving, sacrificing, and sustaining

• Godlike Ego. The only kind of ego worthy of contemplation is the kind of ego that our Creator possess: absolute, ultimate, gigantic, hug. Once this godlike ego enteres your consciousness, it naturally destroys petty-mindedness and expands awareness.
• Godlike Humility. When you get your “small ego” out of the way, your life can unfold naturally. The other side of a godlike ego is godlike humility. This is also the objective of a Thick Face, Black Heart practitioner: to be able to get petty-mindedness out of the way and simultaneously master ultimate humility and frailty.
• Although the East and West may not agree with the terminology and definition of the word ego, they both agree with teh importance of developing that awareness which supports your sense of connnection to your Divin Maker and assists you in manifesting a strong sense of who you are in achieving that we should uproot th einferior and unworthy qualities from the depts of our souls.
• During my spiritual studies, I have seen no diverstiy, only unity, among the teachings of the East and West. East and West may have differnet metaphors and symbols, but the differences are only in the wrappping, not in the essence.

Chapter 15: Paths to Thick Face, Black Heart

• Our Divin Maker did not leave His children without an operation manual; however, we did not know where to find this manual or how to read it. This mysterious operating manual is located within as well as without each of us.
• Everything we do in life is motivated by our basic desire to "feel good," to experience the connection with the Divin power within each one of us. Because our actions are guided by either ignorance or wisom, the consequences produced are either negative or positive. Nevertheless, our motivation is a noble one: teh desire constnatly to be immersed in that blissful state.
• Man goes to great trouble to acquire knowledge of the material world, yet he never tries to find out what exists within himself. Becuase he is unaware of the enormous power that lies hidden within him, he looks for support in the outer world.
• Seven Centering Techniques

Practice the Presence of God. Invoking the power of the name of the Divine inspires identification with the Divine. Among all the methods of spiritual practices, this is the easiest for busy people.

Prana Yama, The Art of Breathing. Breath is closely connected to the well-being of the mind. When we master our minds, we master our world:

Sit quietely on a wool mat on the floor, or on a chair, with your back erect, body relaxed, and stomach empty.

Close your eyes. Bring your attention to your breathing. Wach your breath naturally go in and out of your body.

Listen to the sound of hamsa as you breathe. When your breath comes in, you hear the natural sound ham; and as the breath goes out, sa. Watch the space between the inhalation and the exhalation.

With your mind, follow the breath, observe the space where inhalation meets exhalation, approximately twelve fingers distance from the nostrils. Behold the space between the breaths, for it is the gate to teh mystery of this universe and beyond.

Invoking the INner Music. While the mind is calm and serene, sit quietly and listen for the inner musci. One may hear the sounds of buzzing bees, running water, the clestial flute, the hitting of the gongs, the blowing of a horm, or a mixture of all of tehm in a tranquil and harmonious arrangment. Just absorb yoursel fin that inner bliss.

Unloking teh Inner Vision. As your mind becomes clam, you may see Divine visions, such as white light, blue light, stars or galaxies.

Contemplating the Vast Open Space. When you are gazing into the sky, open desert, or teh ocean, imagine these vast spaces as expressions of the Divine. Then let this image dissolve in your head. As your mind merges with the vast open space, the reality of outer and inner become one. At that moment, you will experience the whole universe bathed in the Light of the Divine.

Courting Blissful Obliviou. The bliss of sex mirrors the  bliss of the Divine. God’s bliss is present everywhere, and we can gain a gleam into the source of His divine bliss during our sexual encounters.

At the smae time of sexual intercourse, an abosoprtion into your partner brought about by excitement and the final delight that ensures an orgasm betokens the delight of the Divine.

During the time of organsm, instead of focusing on the joy of the organsm, focus on the source of that orgasm. By following the source of the orgasm, one discovers the source of all delight: the delight of the Divine.

Even in the absence of a lover, there is a flood of delight, simply by the intensity of the memory of sexual pleasure.

On the occasion of great delight being obtained, or on the occasion of delight arising from seeing a friend or relative after a long time, one should mediate on teh delight itself and become absorbed in it. One’s mind will then identify with the source of the delight.

Soliciting Joy from the Pleausre of Eating. When one experiences the expansion of joy, or savors the pleasure arising from eating or drinking, one should medidate on the perfect condition of this joy. Then there will be supreme delight.

The two wheels of Thick Face, Black Heart are the knowledge and experience of spiritual matter combined with teh awareness of hte practical sciences of survival.

Chapter 16: How a Piranha Eats the Shark

Think and Rethink

From How to Have Kick-Ass Ideas: Get Curious, Get Adventurous, Get Creative by Chris Barez-Brown

I made the decision to be engaged, energized and optimistic about my opportunities.

Look for humour and opportunity. Ask:

• What’s the worst that can happen?
• How can I find this funny?
• How can I turn this situation into an opportunity to learn something about myself and change something for better in my life?
• What could this be about?
• What is interesting about this?
• What is the principle that I can apply to my situation?
• So what can I do with that?
• So what could that look like?
• So how might that work?
• How can I frame this area of opportunity in a positive and inspiring way?
• How well does this help me make the most of this opportunity?
• So what ideas does this give me?

Being curious

• When have you been curious before?
• Why have you been curious?
• How can you feel like that again?

About life. Ask:

• What in this life do you want to achieve?
• What do you want to be remembered for?
• How do you want to have spent your time?
• What will you want to have learned?
• What impact would you like to make in the world?
• Whose lives would you like to have touched and how?
• What in your dreams would you really have lovedt to have done?
• What are your passions?
• What would you love to be?
• What values are essential to your life?
• What is the value the absence of which makes your life not worth living?
• What value must you honor if you are to be truly you?
• What are the impotant things in your life?

How?

• How to wake up in the morning gagging to get stuck into my life and go to sleep feeling I have achieved more than I had imagined I could.
• How do I get more money?
• How do I get more work experience?
• How do I get 3 condominiums?

Creativity Exercises

One. Clever Friends, Super Heroes

• What would they do in your situation?
• What advice would they give you?
• How would they get unstuck?
• In what way would they make this opportunity happen?

Two. Where Else In The World?

• Write your issue down
• Ask where in sport has someone faced a similar issue?
• In which film did a similar situation exist?
• Who in the world is an expert at overcoming such an issue?
• Where in business have people solved this problem?
• When have you experienced a similar issue in another aspect of your life?
• Whwere in business have people solved this problem?
• When has nature faced this issue?
• Who does this everyday of their life?
• Which of your friends have had a similar headache?
• Explore the principles behind their success and apply them to your issue.

Three. Draw

Four. Be A Child

• Get into being a child
• What is it?
• Why are you stuck?
• What are the things stanind in your way?

Five. Phone a Friend

• Talk it out.
• Ask for opinions, advice.
• Get a different perspective

Six. Big Questions

• What if I couldn’t fail? What would I do then?
• What if I had only one day to live? What would I do then?
• What if I ahd all the money in the world? What would I do then?
• What if I was trying to get fired? What ideas come to mind?
• What if it was my son/daughter who was stuck and frustrated? What advice would I give them?
• What if I wans’t scared of anything?
• What if I want to be famous?
• What if my life had to be exceptional or I would be sent to jail?
• What if learning and growing were the most imporatnt things in my life? Then what would I do?
• What if I wasn’t stuck at all and I’ve had the answer all along?

SEVEN. Big of Tricks

• Fill a bag of random objects
• Pull them out
• Write what ideas come up

EIGHT. Take a Bus Ride

• Get onto a bus
• Observe the moving surroundings
• Write whatever ideas come up

NINE. Day Dream

TEN. Walk in Nature

ELEVEN. Get physical! Exercise!

TWELVE. Sleep

THIRTEEN. Bathe

FOURTEEN. Chill

FIFTEEN. Find an enthusiast 

• What is the first manageable stage of the fantasy that you want to make real?
• Who are your heroes and why do they have such an impact upon you? Discuss with someone. Look deeply into their lives, achievements, wisdom
• Admit your ignorance. Ask for details. Ask “What if…?” “Why not…?”

Questions to Ask in the Mirror

• Do I recognize this person?
• What are the obvious changes or improvments I wuold like to make in the way I lead my life?
• Have I included enought about relationships with those dear to me?
• Am I leading the creative life I know I should be leading?
• Am I writing this story or does it seem as if the script is written for me — by others, by circumstances?

“I could have done what you’ve done.” “Yes, but you didn’t — I did.”

“Persistence. Persistence. Persistence.”

“Let’s try another way.”

“Time not yet invested, Skill not yet acquired.”

20/80 Principle

From Richard Koch’s 20/80 Principle

• Principle of keeping your life clear for the important things
• Be unconventional and eccentric in how you use time
• Attend the most important meetings
• Do the most important things/activities
• Be there at the most important times
• Know the most important people
• For both professional and personal relationships, fewer and deeper is better than more and less deep
• As early as posslbe, develop a consistent, long-term investment strategy, based on principles that have worked well in the past
• Continue to accumulate
• Make yourself happier by changing the people you see most
• Be aware of the snake pits: write them down
• B

My happiness Islands:

• Him
• Sleeping
• Accomplishing what I set out to do
• Exercising

My Unhappiness Islands

• waking up with little sleep
• useless, irrational thinking, daydreaming, fantasizing
• Getting nagged about money
• Runing out of money, asking for money

My Aachievement Islands

• Exercising in Year 1/2
• Deans List Sem
• Time when early sleep/wake up with morning exercises

10 Low value uses of time

1. Things other people want you to do
2. Things that have always been done this way
3. Things you’re not unusually good at doing
4. Things you don’t enjoy doing
5. Things that are always interrupted
6. Things few other people are interested in
7. Things that have already taken twice as long as you orginally expected
8. Things where your collaborators are unreliable / low qualit
9. Things that have a predictable cycle
10. Answering the phone

10 Highest value uses of time

1. Things that achieve your overall purpose in life
2. Things you have always wanted to do
3. Things already in the 20/80 relationship of time  to result
4. Innovative ways of doing things that promise to slash the time required and/or multiply the quality of results
5. Things other people tell you can’t be done
6. Things that use your own creativity
7. Things other people ahve done successfully in a different arena
8. Things that you can get other people to do for you with relatively little effort on your part
9. Anything with high-quality collaborators who have already transcended the 80/20 rule of time, who use time eccentrically and effectively
10. Things for which is now or never

When thinking about potential use of time

1. Is it unconventional?
2. Does it promise to mutiply effectiveness?

10 Golden rules for Career Success

1. Specialize in a very small niche; develop the core skill
2. Choose a niche that you enjoy, where you can excel and stand a chance of becoming an acknowledged leader
3. Realize that knowledge is power
4. Identify your market and your core customers and serve them the best
5. Identify where 20% of effort gives 80% of returns
6. Learn from the best
7. Become self-employed early in your career
8. Employ as many net value creators as possible
9. Use outside contractors for everything but your core skill
10. Exploit capital leverage

Koch’s 10 Commandments of Investment

1. Make your investment philosophy reflect your personality
2. Be proactive and unbalanced (invest in a few investments your convinced will give high returns)
3. Invest mainly in the stock market
4. Invest for the long term
5. Invest most when the market is low
6. If you can’t beat the market, track it
7. Build your investments on your expertise
8. Consider the merits of emerging markets
9. Cull your loss makers (>15%)
10. Run your gains

Daily Happiness Habits

1. Exercise
2. Mental stimulation
3. Spiritual/Artistic stimulation/mediation
4. Doing a good turn/deed
5. Taking a pleasure break with a friend
6. Giving yourself a treat
7. Congratulating yourself

Medium-term Strategies

1. Maximize your control
2. Be flexible
3. Set attainable goals
4. Have a close relationship with your partner
5. Have a few happy friends
6. Have a few close professional alliances
7. Evolved your ideal lifestyle

Improving Workday Productivity

 

1. If you want to manage and organize your priorities, you must first learn to manage yourself
2. Recognize and accept areas your can’t control; rate areas you can control and act upon them.
3. You already have as much time there is. and there isn’t any more.
4. You can’t save time, you can only spend it. Spend it where it will give you the greatest returns.
5. Working for long hours can actually reduct or erase your productivity.
6. If you work smarter, instead of harder, you can be productive and relaxed at the same time.
7. Successful self management is the result of developing good habits and letting them control you thereby giving you freedom.
8. It takes 30 days of conscious and spaced repetition of an action to devlop a new habit or elimiate an old one.
9. If things aren’t getting done, there are many common productivity killers that may be at fault.
10. Recognize your weaknessess and develop a plan to build new habits then.
11. New habits are fragile, creating them requires commitmen.t

Japan

As I prepare my trip to Japan, I shall use this a site to store information that I gather

• Open a bank account: bank drafts
• Check the banks: the services they provide for overseas students
• Join the International Society
• Stay healthy: bring nutrition and medication
• Stay in touch: Skype
• Carry a list of emergency numbers in the wallet
• Photocopy all important documents and leave one set at home
• Global input method or language pack for internet explore
• Bring the transcript file

Schmoozing

This entry is about the art of schmoozing. Taken from Guy Kawasaki’s blog, he argues that the key is to establish a relationship before you need it. That is, networking. Here’s his suggestions:

1. Understand the goal. Darcy Rezac in his book, The Frog and the Prince, wrote the world’s best definition of schmoozing: “Discovering what you can do for someone else.” Herein lies eighty percent of the battle: great schmoozers want to know what they can do for you, not what the you can do for them. If you understand this, the rest is just mechanics.
2. Get out. Schmoozing is an analog, contact sport. You can’t do it alone from your office on the phone or via a computer. You may hate them but force yourself to go to tradeshows, conventions, and seminars. It’s unlikely that you’ll be closing a big order with someone you met online at MySpace or via Skype. Get out there and press flesh.
3. Ask good questions, then shut up. The mark of a good conversationalist is not that you can talk a lot. The mark is that you can get others to talk a lot. Thus, good schmoozers are good listeners, not good talkers. Ask softball questions like, “What do you do?” “Where are you from?” “What brings you to this event?” Then listen. Ironically, you’ll be remembered as an interesting person.
4. Unveil your passions. Only talking about business is boring. Good schmoozers unveil their passions after they get to know you. Great schmoozers lead off with their passions. Your passions make you an interesting person–you’ll stick out because you’re the only person not talking about 802.11 chipsets at the wireless conference. Personally, my passions are children, Macintosh, Breitling watches, digital photography, and hockey if you ever meet me.
5. Read voraciously. In order to be a good schmoozer, you need to read voraciously–and not just the EE Times, PC Magazine, and the Wall Street Journal. You need a broad base of knowledge so that you can access a vast array of information during conversations. Even if you are a pathetic passionless person, you can at least be a well-read one who can talk about a variety of topics.
6. Follow up. Over the course of my career, I’ve given away thousands of business cards. At one point, I thought I was nuts because if all those people called or emailed me, I’d never get anything done. Funny thing: hardly anyone ever follows up. Frankly, I don’t know why people bother asking for a business card if they’re not going to follow up. Great schmoozers follow up within twenty-four hours–just a short email will do: “Nice to meet you. I hope we can do something together. Hope your blog is doing well. I loved your Breitling watch. I have two tickets to the Stanley Cup Finals if you want to attend.” Include at least one thing to show the recipient that she isn’t getting a canned email.
7. Make it easy to get in touch. Many people who want to be great schmoozers, ironically, don’t make it easy to get in touch with them. They don’t carry business cards, or their business cards don’t have phone numbers and email addresses. Even if they provide this information, it’s in grey six-point type. This is great if you’re schmoozing teenagers, but if you want old, rich, famous, and powerful people to call or email, you’d better use a twelve-point font. (These are the same folks that need the thirty-point font vis-a-vis the 10/20/30 Rule of PowerPoint.)
8. Give favors. One of my great pleasures in life is helping other people; I believe there’s a big Karmic scoreboard in the sky. God is keeping track of the good that you do, and She is particularly pleased when you give favors without the expectation of return from the recipient. The scoreboard always pays back. You can also guess that I strongly believe in returning favors for people who have helped you.
9. Ask for the return of favors. Good schmoozers give favors. Good schmoozers also return favors. However, great schmoozers ask for the return of favors. You may find this puzzling: Isn’t it better to keep someone indebted to you? The answer is no, and this is because keeping someone indebted to you puts undue pressure on your relationship. Any decent person feels guilty and indebted. By asking for, and receiving, a return favor, you clear the decks, relieve the pressure, and set up for a whole new round of give and take. After a few rounds of give and take, you’re best friends, and you have mastered the art of schmoozing.

Career

Be a career activist: craft your own future

• take control
• be vigilant on your behalf, identify and prepare for opportunities, rather than expecting anyone else to guide you during your day and do reconnaisance
• be independent, define yourself in temrs and concepts that are independent of your jbo title, organization, or what other people think you should
• be entrepreneurial — look for opportunity, undertake enterprise that provide opportunities and risk
• be informed, vigilant, flexible
• be passionate, engaged
• be an unconventional thinker with no preconceived concepts
• be opportunistic
• be mobile, fast, fluid
• be well-informed about both your strengths and environemnt
• turn advantages into opportunities

Knoew yourself, know who you are, what you are good at, the contents of your personal portfolio, what you have to do. Redefine your experiences to identify underlying themes and skills

• Personal “work ID” based on skills, attributes, interest, values and personal prefernce
• personal portfolio, identify assets and potential liabitlies. What are your distinctive skills and strengths? What value do you add? Are you constantly vigilant in seeking opportunities and market niches for your services? What specific steps can you take to overcome or limit personal liabilities?
• Think of yourself as a coporation of one, with a number of departments and you as the product

Marketing: What key assets do you have to sell? What market niche can you expoit? What opportuniteis can you take advatnage of? Do you have a marketing plan? What is your product worth? Have you developed creative and effective ways of selling your services?

R&D: What are the areas in which you’re going to learn and develop? How are you going to keep your skills on the leading edge?

Production: What services are you going to offor?

Pomotion and Public Relations: How are you going to promote your product?

Know what you love: what is most important to you

• be engaged: flow

Be who you are: see yourself as capable. Develop a personal success paradigm

• If I have to change my life when I arrive at work each morning, that’s slavery
• be authentic
• play to your strenghts
• you will get more return for you investment of time and effort by becoming better at what you are already good at.
• Find environments to play to your strengths
• become even better in areas you’re already good at
• be patient when you’re learning in an area that doesn’t play to your strengths but is a must for your work
• Believe in yourself: as a competent, effective human being
• be realistic in your appraisal of change and your ability to manage it

Ensure your Marketability

1. If your current assignment ended tomorrow, how quicly could you find a new one?
2. Are your skills up to the standard set by the external community or are you evaluating yourself against internal corporate standards?
3. Are you confident that your skills and knowledge are sufficiently current that you could sell your services to another employer/client?
4. Do you search for opportunities to enhance your marketability?
5. Do you have a full tool kit, portfolio, of goals? Are you always looking for opportunities to fill up your toolkit to ensure your longer term marketability?
6. Is what you are dling providing experiences or new skills that enhance your marketability?
7. Are you updating your resume every 6 months?

• Think of everyone you work for as a client rather than a boss.
• Know your product: you and the skills you have to offer — your assets, strengths, and potential liabilities, and how you can add value to an employer or client.
• Know your market: both current and prospective clients.
• Be able to communiate your strongest selling points to your market
• Look for opportunities to leverage skills and experience, identify business niches and unexploited areas where you can add value.

Have a Fall Back Position

1. Could you readily change career directions if required?
2. If you lost your main source of income tomorrow, could you successfully move onto another course?
3. If there was a downturn in your industry/profression, could you transfer your skills to pursue an alternative career directly?

• Have a broad repertoire of skills within your portfolio

Build Broad Networkds

1. Do you cultivate relationships with people outside your profession, employer or industry?
2. Do you cultivate and nurture relationships with a broad range of people?
3. Do you stay in touch with people just for the sake of staying in touch, or because of their economic utility?
4. Do you feel comfortable “networking” or do you see it as phony and insincere?

• Get involved in multiple networks to develop a reputation for breadth and flexibility.
• Develop mutually supportive relationships.
• Every relationship can be worth cultivating.
• Send a news paper or magazine article as an “information brief.”

Market, Market, Market

1. Are people you work with aware of your important accomplishments, skills, and work experiences?
2. Do you keep people infomred of your significant work accomplishments and experiences?
3. Are you staying in touch with the people you should — are you keeping your network alive?
4. Do you stay in touch with people to remind them of your skills and how you can add value, or do you just assume that they should know or remember?
5. Doi you feel comfortable marketing yourself or do you feel that it is “below you” or that it shouldn’t be necessary?

• To market yourself effectively, Don’t assume what is obvious to you to others. Point it out. Remind them at appropriate intervals.
• Keep people informed about what you are doing. Look for opportunities to exchange information with them about your work.
• Get to know your clients well enough to anticipate their needs.

Think Globally — Cultuarl and Linguistic Versatility Count

1. When yoiu think of work and your future, do you think of it locally, nationally or internationally?
2. Where are the geographical boundaries of your work?
3. How many languages do you speak?
4. Do you read international journals or belong to international associations that keep you abreast with international trends?
5. Are you online, exchanging information worldwide (e.g. are you on a bulletine board or part of a discussion group)?

• Living and working internationally helps you gain richer concepts not only in the mechanics of business, but also in teh principle of life and work

Be able to communicate in powerful, persuasive and unconventional ways

1. Can you quickly capture your listener’s attentiona nd get your message across?
2. Can you use words to paint a pciture, tell a story, make information vivid?
3. Can you wirte clearly, persuasively, and with impact?
4. Can you zero in on concepts and tranlate them appropriately for your listener’s requirements? (or do you tend to embellish needlessly and bury vital points in a pile of superfluous information?)
5. Can you quicly establish relationships and credibility with people you’ve never met without face-to-face contact

• One of the critical ckills for career success will be being able to comunicate graphically, compelling and quickly in both oral and in written forms

Keep on Learning

1. Are you feeling stretched in a positive way?
2. Are you experiencing “flow”?
3. Can you describe what you have learned in the last 6 months?
4. Can you describe what you hope to learn in the next 6 months?
5. Are you aware of the most recent trends in your field and their implications for your longer-term success?
6. Do you know what skills and knowledge you need to develop in order to ensure your success and employability?

• Take responsibility for what you decide to learn
• Stay current in your own field, and continue to develop skills and knowledge outside it.
• Be an agile learner
• Benefit from your on-the-job experience
• Seek opportunities from learning both inside and outside your workplace.
• Take courses, read books and journals, develop and practice new skills
• Look at period of full time education between periods of work, not as “the off” but as smart career moves preparing you for the future.

Understand Business Trends

1. Do you regularly read business magazines or the business section of your newspaper?
2. Can you identify three trends that will have significant impact on your industry in the next 5 years?
3. Do you know what new technologies might shape your industry in the next 5 years?
4. Do you know what the potential trheats are to your industry/profession?

• Read the business press or keep current through electronic media, and keep track of the fast-changing economic and social landscape. Understand the competitive environment. Get info from a variety of sources and maintain an independent and critical perspective.

Prepare for Areas of Competence, not Jobs

1. Can you describe 3-5 roles that you perform in your day-to-day work?
2. Can you identify 3 roles that you play and how that are independent of your particular job that you could transfer to another work-setting?

• The “hot” jobs of today may not exist in the future.
• Define yourself by what you do and how you get it done, not by your job title
• Identify the different roles you play and how they are applied in other work environments

Resourceful/enterprising

Opportunity-seeker

Time-urgent

Market-driven

Globally-oriented

ROI thinker

Self-confident

Committed/Enthusiastic

Innovative/Creative

Gymnastically flexible

Resilient

Independent/Self-reliant

Ruthless time manager

Balancer of Work/personal life

High-impact risk taker

Obsessively customer-oriented

Problem-solver

Self-promoter

Team worker/leader

Compelling communicator

Insatialbe learner

Leading-edge professional

Build Financial Independence

• Are your most important career and life decisions driven by money?
• Are you “owned” by your debt?
• If you lost your income tomorrow, do you have sufficient savings to tide you over until you find a replacement source of income?

Rethink your Relationship with Money

1. Do you find yourself surrounded by lots of stuff, yet unable to afford to buy things that are important to you?
2. Would you be willing to give up income in order to work less? Would you be able to?
3. Are youmaking significant sacrifices to maintian a particular standard of living?
4. Does all the stuff you buy contribute to your family’s happiness, and if no, could you give up buying it?

• Carefully review your personal values. Know what is really important to you. Ask yourself: What do I really care about? Are my values being met?
• For everything you do, ask yourself: Why am I doing this? Is this meeting my need for personhood? Will it help me in my chosen role?
• Be ruthless in evaluating how your current lifestyle is contributing to satisfying your deeply held values
• “How much of my life energy is this [thing you fancy buying] really worth?”

Think Lattice, Not Ladders

• The career ladder is now more like a lattice: you may have to move sideways before you can move up. In a lattice everything is connected.
• Be active in seeking out new opportunities
• Consider possibilities for job enrichment in a lateral move into a new work assignment that offers opportunities for learning and development, opportunities to mentor younger staff, participate in task forces, and interesting educational programs.
• Track your progress not by your job title or level, but by the dept of content of your work, its importance to the organization and to customers and whether you are still learning and having fun.

Are you more of a Specialist or Generalist?

1. Do you want to grow and develop within your specialty?
2. Do you prefer to broaden rather than deepen your skills and knowledge?

• Conduct a searching self-assessment to make sure you have what it takes to rise to the top of your profession.
• Take an equally careful look at market conditions to make sure that you are investing your career assets in an in-demand specialty
• Stay on top of teh newest trends and information in your profession
• Don’t give up on your general skills
• Find a mentor who:

acts as a sounding board

coach you in effective behaviors

provide insight into corporate politics

open doors for you

act as an individualj on your behalf

give you honest feedback

Be a Ruthless Time Manager

1. Do you have a clear concept of what is important to you and consciously make decisions about how you spend your time in relation to this?
2. Can you, and are you prepared to say “No” to exessive work demands?
3. Are you satisfied with the amount of time you are spending with people and activities that are important to your life?
4. Are you allowing important relationships to suffer becuase of excessive work commitments?
5. Can you allow some things to go “undone” without experiencing undue stress?

Brand You

You are the CEO of your Life.

1. What do I want to be?
2. What do I want to stand for?
3. Does my work matter?
4. Am I making a difference?

 

Is what I’m doing RIGHT NOW consisten with building a brand, my brand?

 

Personal Brand Equity Equation:

1. I am known for [1-2 things]. By this time next year, I plan also to be known for [1-2 more things].
2. My current project is challenging me in the following [1-3 ways].
3. New stuff i’ve learned in the last 90 days includes [...]
4. Important new addtions to my rolodex in the last 90 days includes [2-4 names].
5. My public — local/regional/national/global — “visibility program” consists of [1-2 things].
6. My principal “resume enhancing activity” for the next 90 days is [1 item].
7. My resume/CV is discernibly differnet from last years on this date in the following [1-2 ways].

Pressure

“Pressure is nothing more than the shadow of great opportunity.”

– Michael Jordan